I’m writing this, cause well, I want to.
It’s 5:57 in the morning here.
When I begun this blog, I had no particular pattern I wanted it to take. I considered making it a kind of diary or journal, but quickly discovered I was too insecure for that, so I could just pick a happening from a day, and then look to make a post out of it.
It worked for me.
When I begun to reply to the daily prompts three days ago, I really enjoyed it cause I got to do what I loved. Writing fiction.
However, I knew that this moment would come, and I knew it would come this early, cause it always happens.
When I begin anything, I begin reserved. I partly am, but once I start to get comfortable, I’m not even sure I like it. Cause getting comfortable for instance on WordPress would make me comment on a post without thinking I should just mind my business and that the blogger might just begin to get tired of me.
This is not blog post to evoke any one’s pity. I just wanted to get it out.
This doesn’t have to do with anyone.
Second guessing everything is a second nature of mine.
I might just have known someone, and take for example we were chatting on a social media. If I like the person, I mean liking the person enough to engage in a discussion with the individual, it always happens that I ask, some way into the chat something like:
I hope I’m not wasting your time
I hope I’m not being a pest
Apologizing for something I said that isn’t even rude….
And it goes on.
Worse still, when I do this things, I just want to disappear from the face of the earth. I get mortified. Why do I ask these questions?
Honestly these things get me to want to cry sometimes.
So yeah, I guess I’m saying this cause I’m beginning to feel that way here on WordPress.
Have a blessed Monday.